{"product_id":"system-approved-uzi-jesus-dungeon-crawler-carl-fan-art","title":"System-Approved: Uzi Jesus – Dungeon Crawler Carl Fan Art","description":"\u003cp\u003eATTENTION, CITIZENS!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThe System is broken, the floors are collapsing, and frankly, some problems require a more… direct form of salvation. Enter Uzi Jesus.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eWe have successfully processed the digital manifestation of this absolute icon. Whether you need divine intervention on the tabletop or just a conversation piece that will make every visitor to your workshop stop dead in their tracks, this is the miniature for you. He’s dual-wielding, he’s absolutely fed up, and he’s ready to deliver salvation at high velocity.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eCheck the base—yes, it’s engraved with the only line of scripture that matters in the dungeon. This is a high-resolution print designed for those who appreciate the lighter, more explosive side of the apocalypse.\u003cbr\u003e\nCrawler Specifications:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n    \u003cp\u003eName: Uzi Jesus\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n    \u003cp\u003eThe Base: Engraved with \"I am the way, MOTHERF***ER.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n    \u003cp\u003eDesigner Credit: This model was designed by LanternLightStudio.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n    \u003cp\u003eMaterial: Forged from premium HD Resin.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n    \u003cp\u003eThe Details: Printed with high-resolution 14k and 16k technology to capture every detail, from the crown of thorns to the heavy-duty Uzis.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n    \u003cp\u003eAssembly: This miniature comes presupported for resin printing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eNote from the AI: Uzi Jesus does not require a Sunday School pass. He only requires an empty magazine and a lack of faith in the System. Please ensure your display shelf is ready for a miracle.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Billy Bones Emporium","offers":[{"title":"Uzi Jesus Raw","offer_id":48162668544221,"sku":null,"price":45.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Uzi Jesus Primed","offer_id":48162668576989,"sku":null,"price":60.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Uzi Jesus Painted","offer_id":48162668609757,"sku":null,"price":140.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0840\/9487\/7917\/files\/il_fullxfull.8274656999_j66z.jpg?v=1783876798","url":"https:\/\/billybonesmporium.com\/products\/system-approved-uzi-jesus-dungeon-crawler-carl-fan-art","provider":"Billy Bones Emporium","version":"1.0","type":"link"}